Me: "Who has the best seat in the house, me or daddy?"

Adam: "Well, Daddy's is nice, but yours is best. Your's is squishier."

Sunday, June 12, 2016

A Bottle of Mud


See, Jonah-boy likes to make potions.  
Well, sometimes they're science experiments.
He calls it school.  
There is always water,  
There are usually a variety of botanicals;
 leaves, grass clippings, flower petals. 
Far too often,
  illicit food coloring is involved.

  Always, the concoction is carefully brewed in a plastic water bottle.

When it's a science experiment, I'll often find it on a table top, a bookshelf, or in a cupboard.   Now, potions on the other hand, they might be in a drawer, a treasure chest... under a pillow. 
Cuz, you know, 
mysterious.

This time it involved a boy's best friend; dirt.
(you do the math: dirt + water = ____ )  

I don't know if it was molecular or mystical, because I never saw it this particular fusion first hand.
 I only saw the aftermath...

A seriously clogged drain. 

 I called Jonah in and showed him the cistern of slop.  
His mouth dropped open when he realized the mechanics of mud in pipes. 
 "Oh, Mom, I'm so sorry."

And he really was.
And he figured that was the end of it, 
so he turned to walk away.

"Hey, buddy, guess what?

"What?"


"Today, you get to learn how to unclog a drain."

Talk about natural consequences, baby!


(fast forward past the extraction of the six inch girl-hair plug that turned out to be the real problem, cuz' EWW!  I gotta say, though, Jonah was really proud of how he wrangled the tangled tresses out of the drain with a shish-kebab skewer. 
Re-spect.)

But, as any home-plumber knows, the end of the clog does not mean the end of the job.  As I was putting the plug assembly back together, the tired old plastic pivot nut snapped.

Hence, on to...

...the internet (to learn that it's called a pivot nut, because the guys at Lowe's look at me funny when I call things Doo-Hickies).

...the hardware store (to learn that they don't sell pivot nuts by themselves.  Of course. Because that would be too simple).

...home, with my new drain assembly (to learn that the new pipe is an inch too short).

...the hardware store (sigh.  Seriously.  It's a conspiracy)

....home and under the sink...
with another little helper.


So Jonah learned how to unstop a drain, and also that the magic leaks out of the potion once you dump it in the sink.  I learned that Guy is right.  Plumbing is stupid.  And expensive.  And a conspiracy.  And, I hope, Nano learned somewhere in her little brain that girls can fix things.

All that learning from one little bottle of mud.
Not bad.
I guess Jonah-boy is right.  It really was school.

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