Sisters ~ Lost Post #1

These two girls are 

black and white

sweet and salty

cool turquoise and warm lavender

They fought over what color they would paint their room for weeks.  

Finally, I took the decision away

"Grey.  End of story."

Maybe I can help them find the neutral ground in their relationship.

*****

 Whenever they fight, 

I tell my girls they need to understand something...

(here is my lecture, in case you need to use it sometime):

"Your sister is the best friend you will ever have.  You will have a million friends in your life, but most will disappear in 5 years.  If you are lucky, you will still have one or two of those friends when you are an adult*see note. But your sister is the friend that God hand picked for you.  She will be at your wedding, and your births, and she will be there for every important event in your life, for the REST of your life.  You need to cherish your relationship with her.  Protect it and take care of it.  

(blah blah blah, ten more minutes of similar content)"

I worry, though.  I really believe what I am saying.  And I know that some sibling relationships develop deep wounds in childhood and teen years that leave scars.  Big ones.  But then there are some siblings that have sweet and amazing relationships, and I can only assume those seeds sprouted in childhood, as well.

I want that for my kids (the seed thing, not the scar thing).

The grey space where they both can Be.

Together, but unique

Supportive, with boundaries

Helpful, but not codependent

Individuals, but never alone.

 

*Remember in the lecture when I said that bit about only having one or two lifetime friends?

That might have been a fib, but only because I have been soooo blessed in my life with many dear and amazing life-long friendships.  True soul sisters.  But I don't think that is how it is for most people, and I never take that blessing for granted.

*****

This post, and perhaps a dozen others, were begun and never finished since I have been sick and overwhelmingly busy in the past year.  I was going to let them go, but then I realized that since this blog is really for my family, it doesn't matter when I post them, only that I do.  So this is the first of many Lost Posts that I will publish.